Monday, September 27, 2010

Sucktastic 20 16.5 miler


How to ensure you have a sucktastic 20 16.5 miler...

  • take the week off from work. Take on many home improvements and spend ZERO time running
  • run over big toe with dresser during home improvements and rip nail straight down center...i didn't know a toe could bleed so much. yuck.
  • ensue on a diet coke binge...and drink nothing but it for the entire week leading up to the big run
  • go on "at home diet"...junk. junk. junk.
  • carb load night before big run with McNasty's (aka McDonalds)...seriously, WTH?
  • start morning waking up LATE and fighting with daughter all the way to school
  • try out "race day outfit"
  • hate "race day shirt" 1/2 mile in
  • Itch like CRAZY!
  • did I mention the high wind advisory for the day? Just imagine running. in. wind. tunnel.
  • Upset tummy by mile 3
  • stop at mile 6 for the porta potty, but suffer a case of shy bladder and can't go:/
  • see nicole at mile 9 which is the ONLY good part of my run
  • bring on the calf cramps at mile 10! Whoot whoot!
  • so excited for a huge drink of water at mile 11...only to find a swallow barely enough for me to gag down some Gu
  • curse, stomp, rant to mile 12 when the numbness down my right leg rears it's ugly head
  • text nicole quote "eff this, pick me up"
  • right foot/calf/hamstring alternate between numb/throbbing. sweet
  • call my mom and beg for a ride. denied.
  • sit down on side of trail at mile 15 and remove my shoes to assess the damage
  • walk/run barefoot the last 1.5 miles faking a smile, fighting back tears to all of the other "fresh runners" ...isn't it totally normal to pass a girl who looks like she got hit by a bus and is hobbling along barefoot carrying her shoes??
  • sit on side of road at 16.5 and wait for nicole to come save me.
  • sulk, feel angry, weak, let down, pissed off that I didn't man up
  • take first real ice bath
  • shower immediately afterwards because I can't quit shivering
  • sport amazing compression socks...god I love those things!

This weeks run was a HUGE reality check for me. 26.2 miles is going to be no joke.
It's also raised a lot of things to think about for my upcoming race. Like...should I consider running it with my cute Zensah compression socks? What are we going to wear? I'm not sold on the shirt I tried on Friday because it made me itch. Terribly. Did you know that it's been like 100 fricken degrees in California lately? What are some realistic goals I can set for myself? I know this race is going to be 75% mental and 25% physical, how can I mentally prepare so I'm not sitting on the side of the road freaking out? I really want to finish in 4:30, but in reality I know I'm looking closer to 5 hours. Hell, after Friday I would nearly be happy with 6! It's supposed to be taper week, but I'm a little concerned and am considering another try at a long run this weekend...more for my mental well being than anything. Nicole sent me an email today that said, "17 days until we leave for Long Beach"...it nearly made me hyperventilate. What in the world is wrong with me? I've worked really hard and I know I can do this...why do all the sudden I feel so full of doubt? good grief! I truly do need to man up!

So I'm adopting this quote to be my motto for the next 3 weeks:

It's not about waiting for the storm to pass...it's about screaming with the thunder, running with the lightening, and learning to dance in the rain.

I'm really sorry that I've been such a bad blogger, but am hoping to get caught up with my reading soon! And sorry for being so negative...just had to get a few things off my chest.

hope everyone had a fantastic weekend!


17 comments:

Allie said...

I'm sorry you had a difficult run, but we learn our most I think from these challenges. At least you know you can tough it out and push through a lot! No matter what, you still covered 16.5 miles!

the dawn said...

oh man...i remember runs EXACTLY like that. for both of my first two marathons each long run was pure torture. actually i'm not even sure why i kept running after some of the horrifying experiences. but what i love about you is your determination. no where in your post did you even hint about giving up. i love that you have embraced this challenge and all the pain/work/commitment that it requires. it will all be worth it, i assure you!

Nicole said...

Ok. Breathe. You will be FINE.

You had a fantastic 18 miler last weekend. You killed that 18 miler. You could have went 20 that day. You can and WILL go 26.2 miles even if i have to turn my ass around after ive ran the race and come find your ass and drag you to the finish line.

Running a marathon is physical but mental too.. you know this. I've told you this. You can do this. You will do this. You will be peppy and you will be happy and we will get sleep.

we will have braids and we will look cute and spend an hour rocking out to music making jokes about our trip to south bend. you will finish the marathon erika. no if's ands or buts. you do not need to stress about this. two less miles is nothing. you can and will run 8 more after 18.

it will suck major ass but you will do it because you have spent countless hours training, sweating and dieing this summer and quite frankly if you dont, well i wont let you not, but you fucking better. you can curse me every name in the BOOK but you will do it. I believe in you and its time you believe in yourself.

remember, not every run is good. 15 good miles this weekend is better than a shitty 20 miler any day. you know this. i've taught you all i know.

you are erika fucking gerding and you can and WILL run this marathon. so dont doubt yourself. ever. or i will freak out on you. you'll see.

I love you. more than you know. xoxo

*please excuse my rotten mouth...* :)

the dawn said...

p.s. I LOVE that quote. i'm totally going to put it on my mirror and live those words these next three weeks.

and i can't wait to hear all about your triumph on the 17th. it feels scary now, but you will rise to the challenge and kill it!!!!

Missy said...

I'm sorry your run didn't go well, but you will do great at your marathon, because I believe you can do it and I have faith in you!

I am struggling with my longer runs also but I'm figuring out that it's all mental and you just need to not think so much about it and just get in the zone while you're running.

Plus you always have to try new things out to figure out what works best for you! I know you will be good!

Tricia said...

EEK! tough run. soo...the next one is bound to be great..yes?

ann said...

tough run. so sorry it was awful. i would totally run in the compression socks. just did 18 in mine (kept them on for the ice bath too) and it was great. the next one will rock! and you did still run 16.5 - pretty bad ass

Nicki said...

I love the honesty of your thoughts... we've all been there, and you WILL come out stronger because of this! I wish I could say more, other than you inspire me! I'm getting nervous about my long runs... farthest I've gone up until this point is 13.1, but we have to keep going. You CAN and WILL do it!!! We're cheering for you! :)

teacherwoman said...

Keep your chin up girl. Good will come of this!

Tara said...

I am sorry you had such a hard run, but you still went out there and got in a decent amount of miles. Race tips only worry about things you can control...the weather is not one of those things. It's hot this week, but it's cooling down so don't fret about that too much. Finsing the perfect race outfit always makes me feel better and hopefully you can find something you love and are comfortable in.

I think the biggest thing that helps me is to be relaistic about how the race will go and to set goals for yourself that aren't always focused on time or pace. Make sure you smile for the camera, cheer on other runners, no walking, etc.

Morgan said...

I second what Nicole said. LOL! You WILL run this marathon and you ARE ready for it. Don't attempt another 20 miler, enjoy your taper, rest those legs and believe in yourself and your training. I missed my last 20 miler of my first marathon training and I finished just fine. You are ready whether you want to believe it or not. Just try to focus on the rest of the runs you have lined up and reread the GOOD runs you've had they'll help fuel that fire inside you on race day.

Aneta said...

ugh that sounds like an awful run. we all have those. but now that that is out of the way, the next few should be good....right???

abbi said...

Here's hoping the next one is better. As others have said though, often we learn a lot during the bad ones...keep thinking positive!

Molly said...

Ugh, sorry about the crappy run. You had a lot going on before and during...just remember these are training runs, you're training yourself on how to deal when issues pop up. Hang in there!!!

And my CEP socks do come in green, I'm posting a giveaway tomorrow along with a discount code if you want to order some.

Katie said...

Aw, I'm sorry you had such a bad run. That doesn't take away from the fact that you've worked incredibly hard and are ready for the marathon!

PS. I love Nicole's comment. And she is totally right :)

-Katie H @ Legally Fit

Amy said...

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Samantha said...

Souds like a tough run but I bet you have learned a lot from it and know what you can do differently for the rest of training and the race. And we know that running can be almot as much mental as it is physical so that would have been some good training on how to get past the crappy stuff and keep moving forward for 16.5 miles which is still beyond amazing if you ask me!